Machete Kills (Movie Review)

*Updated December 2025

The “1-4-0”: “MACHETE don’t make good sequels.” He’s a great character who ran into a stale script full of retread jokes and too much dialogue. It’s not as funny anymore.

I really love the cast. Among assembling a who’s who of Hispanic Hollywood actors, Demián Bichir and Sofía Vergara steal the show. I also must confess that Lady Gaga was very good in the brief moments she was on screen. She made her scenes look effortless. I think she has a future in the business, if she so desires it.

The characters that director Robert Rodriguez concocted for this franchise are all for the most part memorable. Add the hilarious fake trailers with their grainy 70’s grindhouse look and Machete Kills has something to offer to fans of the exploitation genre.

For a B movie, Machete Kills delivers a high degree of craft, ingenuity, and some great laughs, like the “hanging” scene. You will appreciate the effort, but the script ultimately got away from the director.

The Gist

Machete is recruited by the President of the USA (Charlie Sheen) to head into Mexico and stop a madman Cartel boss from blowing up the White House with a nuclear missile.

What Works

The performances from the lead ensemble are the strongest element. Bichir and Vergara bring a level of energy that carries the film through its slower moments. The visual style remains consistent with the first entry, maintaining that specific 1970s aesthetic that fans of the series enjoy.

What Doesn’t Work

When crafting humor, it really is hit and miss. It looks like Rodriguez brain-drained every great joke on the first movie. In this mediocre sequel, we see jokes being recycled to poker face reactions and too much dialogue that should have been truncated.

This contributed to an uneven flow, and the movie felt a bit on the long side. The whole magic of the first film was based on Danny Trejo’s deadpan brilliance, but he was also given extremely imaginative scenarios to work with. Most of the humor here seemed to have worn out its welcome.

Watch It or Not?

Nay. If this was a great movie I’d say pay for it, but there is much better comedic fare out there worth your hard earned money. Machete Kills isn’t a bad movie, it’s just not as good as the first one. I’d wait for this to hit home video.